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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23922040">viewfinder</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/incendiarism/pseuds/nanodarlings'>nanodarlings (incendiarism)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>i promise you, i was here [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - High School, Ambiguous Relationships, Best Friends, Lee Jeno Is A Sweetheart, M/M, Minor Injuries, Photographer Na Jaemin, it's only mentioned once in passing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 20:55:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,172</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23922040</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/incendiarism/pseuds/nanodarlings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaemin's learnt a lot in his many years of living.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>i promise you, i was here [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1724401</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>54</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>nono birthday bash</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>viewfinder</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/elisu/gifts">elisu</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I did not initially plan to write this. In fact I was largely spurred on by a) the desire to be an overachiever and b) the Reload comeback, and I blew off many of my other responsibilities to write this in a day. But nonetheless here we are! Another one for Qianyi! A sort of expansion on your <em>sneaking out of school to go somewhere beautiful</em> prompt. This time with Jaemin POV! Thank you for reading. Happy birthday (again) to Jeno!</p><p>Series title is from "Not Even This" by Ocean Vuong. It's not necessary to read the first fic to understand this, but I think that they work quite well together :D</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin’s learnt a lot during his many years of living.</p><p>Stuff like how he’s lactose intolerant. How he likes cilantro maybe a bit too much. How he’s possibly addicted to ridiculously overpriced coffee.</p><p>Or stuff like how he doesn’t cry, not really and not often and definitely not in front of others, but he does feel some type of aching hollowness sometimes. How he has a knack for doing the exact opposite of what his parents want from him. How he likes to hyperfixate on things.</p><p>Little facts that he’s filed away for use at some later date.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Lesson One:</p><p>He’s really, <em>really</em> good at getting people to do whatever he wants.</p><p>He doesn’t quite remember when he figured it out—when he realized that he could always somehow worm his way out of punishment, could always manage to charm a few more candies from the little tray in his neighbor’s living room than was strictly fair—but he knows that he’s damn good at it. </p><p>Maybe it’s the way he speaks, words all candied and wrapped up with a pretty bow on top. Or maybe it’s the fact that he’s always been told he looks far too innocent sometimes, that he exudes a sort of pure boy-next-door sort of appeal.</p><p>(Which is <em>bullshit</em>, but that’s a story for another day.)</p><p>No matter why though, it’s something he’s confident in, and he’d be lying to you if he said that he hasn’t used it to his own advantage a few times.</p><p>What else is he supposed to do?</p><p>It’s especially useful when Jeno’s down in one of his funks—stuck inside his own head, wrapped up in his own thoughts. Picking at his own flaws over and over again, prodding at his own insecurities. When he's in that space, it’s not hard to slide up next to him, armed with a barrage of reassurances and compliments, and proceed to remind him of all the ways that Lee Jeno is full of worth and value. And it’s not hard to find him, with time and patience and maybe a few tactical kitten pictures, cheering up at his efforts.</p><p>Jaemin thinks that’s pretty neat.</p><p>Everything about his and Jeno’s relationship is pretty neat of course, but that’s just one of the shining examples. With great power comes great responsibility, right?</p><p>Right.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Lesson Two:</p><p>He’s got some sort of innate attraction to pretty things.</p><p>It’s not shallow, at least not in the way you might think.</p><p>Sure, there’s his affinity to anything that’s got a nice shine to it. His penchant towards giving matching rings and bracelets as birthday gifts simply because <em>they just looked so nice in the store, how could I pass them up? </em>or his tendency to be drawn to new people, pretty people. His many meticulously sorted Pinterest boards. There’s that.</p><p>But there’s also the smaller things, the things that get overlooked in favor of flourishes. Like why he picked up photography.</p><p>It’s looking at the world through the viewfinder. Looking at everything through the lens of the stupidly expensive camera that he worked his ass off at a shitty part time job to pay for—because there was no way in hell his parents would offer to help cover the expense of some meaningless hobby.</p><p>It’s filtering out the little moments that aren’t loud, aren’t bold or recklessly in-your-face, but are pretty in their own merit and capturing them, committing them to film and pixel. When Jeno’s eyes scrunch up a bit as he’s laughing or when he’s particularly enraptured by the stray cat he found at the door of the coffee shop they like to frequent or when he’s working on school stuff sticks his tongue out in concentration.</p><p>Or now, like this. When Jaemin convinces Jeno to go with him on some crazy mission to see the cherry blossoms, even though <em>it’s in the middle of school and exams are in two weeks, Jaemin, have you fucking lost your mind? </em>because at the end of the day Jeno’s awful at saying no to Jaemin. When they get there and Jeno is blown away by the flowers after all. When he laughs and tells Jaemin, “If only you hadn’t dyed your hair blue, you could have been matching!” When Jaemin does nothing but smile and nod, too lost in Jeno instead.</p><p>It’s focusing on <em>Jeno</em>. It’s his finger poised above the shutter, trembling ever so slightly. It’s almost forgetting to even take the damn photo because he gets so caught up in staring, in remembering every crook and trace of the moment, of the boy in front of him—just in case his camera somehow fails him.</p><p>And it’s feeling that sense of contentment, that sense of everything being right with the world when later that night he goes back in the quiet confines of his room and flicks through all the pictures he’d taken that day. Choosing the best ones and printing them out to hang up on the string of fairy lights arranged artfully above his bed—to go alongside the dozens of other photos, polaroids and professionally developed alike, that he’s amassed of their friend group over the years.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Lesson Three:</p><p>Lee Jeno is one of the best things to ever happen to him. And he’d be a damn fool to ever let him go.</p><p>Jeno is comfort, plain and simple. Jeno was there when Jaemin went flying off his scooter and straight into the pavement of a scarily steep hill in second grade. Jeno sat next to him the whole ride to the hospital. Jeno was the first person Jaemin ever came out to and vice versa. Jeno is just <em>good</em>, through and through.</p><p>There’s no pressure with Jeno, no constant need to prove himself. Nothing like his parents or the pretentious assholesthat seem to plague their school.</p><p>Maybe that’s why Jaemin finds himself staring so much, finds himself covering it up by fiddling with camera settings or flat out admitting it unabashedly when he’s feeling bold. Maybe that’s why Jaemin’s never deleted a photo of Jeno, no matter how blurry the quality or dubious the lighting or how much storage it takes up.</p><p>In his heart of all hearts, Jaemin loves Jeno so much that it should be impossible.</p><p>It’s not grand, not brash. Nothing action-movie worthy.</p><p>It’s the type of thing that earns him a patronizing pat on the back from adults, maybe a chuckle or two. A sigh at <em>young love</em>. A jaded toast to a better age, one that’s naive and easily enchanted with the wonders of the world.</p><p>And maybe they’re right. Maybe they’re not.</p><p>Jaemin hasn’t gotten to that part yet.</p><p>All he knows is that Jeno is here in front of him now. Jeno is real—living and breathing, flesh and bone—and Jaemin will take the time to capture him over and over again until the end of everything.</p><p>Because it’s Lee Jeno. And he’s worth everything.</p><p>And Jaemin would hate to end up a fool.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you for reading! once again it's ash! as per usual, any and all comments are much appreciated!</p><p>twt: <a href="https://twitter.com/nanodarlings">@nanodarlings</a><br/>cc: <a href="https://curiouscat.me/aphelions">aphelions</a><br/> </p><p>  <a href="https://hereinevitably.dreamwidth.org/5123.html">inspiration</a><br/></p></blockquote></div></div>
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